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On Life, Love and the Pursuit of Happiness

Get Your Relationship off to a Good Start

Robert Manni - Thursday, August 22, 2013

Most of us have little patience. We want everything right now, especially when it comes to new love.

We spend hours thinking everything through and planning how it could play out, sometimes to the point where we’ve mentally visualized the entire relationship and the breakup before the first date even happens. It’s crazy, but I can understand it. We’re all crazy busy conducting our day-to-day lives and it’s a challenge to pause, exhale and allow a new relationship to grow organically. Regardless of your sex here are a few tips, Guy’s Guy style, for making the best of a new romantic connection.

Be a Buddhist.

Wait—what? One of the tenets for successfully practicing Buddhism is a lack of desire. Of course you're attracted to the person you’re out with, but during those first few dates, try focusing on the journey and not the outcome. You might find that the simple act of sharing the company of someone new and your initial experiences are rewarding without the weight of expectations. Just have a good time and get to know your partner.  That’s it, but it’s not as easy as it sounds unless you commit to it beforehand. Leave your baggage and expectations behind and just…be.

Don’t judge.

We do a lot of judging. Whether it’s for our jobs or from watching all the talent-based reality shows, we live in a society that thrives on turning our thumbs up or down. Unfortunately, too often we carry this mindset into our relationships. In a way it’s understandable. No one wants to waste his or her time dating someone who does not measure up to what we’re seeking in a relationship. But let’s exhale every so often and give the other person the benefit of the doubt for minor infractionslike a guy walking on the inside while you’re traipsing down a crowded street in MePa. News flash. No one’s perfect, not even you, and if we remind ourselves of this every so often, it could allow new love to grow.

Be considerate.

This door swings both ways. If you’re a guy, plan the first date. Listen to what your partner’s interests are and offer up an experience that delights her. Whether it’s an outdoor Shakespeare performance, an ethnic restaurant or a bike ride along the Hudson River Park, plan a date that let’s her know that you’re paying attention and want to please her. Believe me, this goes a long way to getting things off to a great start. If you’re a woman, give the guy a break and return his call or text or whatever in a timely fashion and show up at a reasonable time.  Understand that he’s probably as nervous as you are on that first date. And, if you two click, you might find that the first time isn’t necessary the best time or a reliable indicator of how compatible you’ll be when it comes to intimacy. Just sayin’.

Be honest.

Love can be a game, but you also want to be truthful with yourself. If you’re not feeling it, there’s no need to get into details, but don’t leave your partner dangling. If they did their best, but the chemistry’s not there, let him or her know that you had a nice time and leave it at that. I’m not suggesting downloading the bad news at the end of the first date, but when they follow up for round two, take the call and let them know that you’re passing. Concurrently, if you had a great time and want to see him or her again, there is nothing wrong with letting your new partner know that you had a blast. You never know, they might not be reading the signals clearly and you don’t want to risk that they never call again because they did not think you enjoyed their company. I’m not suggesting that you have to gush, but there are lots of ways to let your partner know that you’re interested in seeing them again.

Life moves quickly and when we fail to keep a handle on it, it can move so fast that we miss out by not taking the time to appreciate the beauty of possibility. Until next time…

Are you doing what it takes to get your new relationship off to a great start? 

The Guys' Guy's Guide to Traveling Light

Robert Manni - Thursday, June 27, 2013

I completed a three-week business trip through Asia carrying only one bag.

It’s not for everyone, but it worked out fine. I’ve been all over the globe for business and pleasure and over time learned not to let unnecessary luggage, clothing and other stuff weigh me down. And I don’t like checking bags if I don’t have to. You’ve seen how some people tote around all their junk wherever they go. I recall an overnight business trip to Miami when new Account Supervisor that I hired showed up at the airport with three full suitcases for the quick trip to a warm climate. Okay, I know some woman carry a lot of stuffand guys do this also. But it was unnecessary and unproductive and we spent extra time dealing with her baggage. Predictably, although for other reasons, she did not work out. The point is, you can travel light, leave your baggage at home and still be effective. So here are a few Guy’s Guy tips based on my experience—you can decide if it's expertisefor traveling light and efficiently while not missing out on the fun.

1. Carry a foldable nylon bag in your luggage.  Sounds easy. It is. That extra bag can carry anything you pick up along the waypresents, a shirt, books, whatever. Believe me, this comes in handy on trips lasting more than three days.

2. The blue blazer. I’m not suggesting that you need the stodgy style with gold buttons, but a smart, up-to-date neutral blazer pairs up with anything, and you can wear it onto the plane. If you dress nicely on the plane instead of a Wallyworld tee shirt and gym shorts, the crew generally treats you better. Just sayin’.

3. Running shoes. Going for a run or doing cardio after a long flight is the perfect antidote to jet lag because it helps reset your body clock. And it works up an appetite for a nice meal after having stale peanuts thrown at you on the plane.  You can wear running shoes onto the plane to save space. If you don’t bring sneakers, wear the bulkiest shoes you have.

4. Wrinkle-free dress shirts. Kind of a no-brainer, but worth mentioning. Nowadays they make these shirts out of comfortable materials and they look just fine without ending up in a ball when you take them out of your bag. I suggest neutral solid colors that can be easily matched.

5. A tie. I bring one tie, something solid or neutral or at least without a design like the Rolling Stones lips and tongue logo. If you need another tie, buy one. It will be fondly remembered as the tie you bought in Brussels.

6. A pair of jeans. Most businesses are more casual now than and you can look sharp in jeans and a blazer on the plane. Plus, you can wear jeans multiple times before washing.

7. Khakis and a polo shirt. Yeah, they kind of suck, but they come in handy for meetings and when jeans won’t do. There are updated versions now that come in different cuts and colors so you won’t look like Wally Cleaver at the client dinner. A short-sleeved neutral polo always comes in handy.

8. Simple workout gear.  One breathable performance tee (leave the tanks at home) and a neutral pair of shorts. Not ocelot prints, please.

9. Bathing suit. Easy to pack, doesn’t take up room and it comes in handy when there is a pool, beach, or steam room. Solid colors, please.

10. Leave your emotional baggage at home. Yeah. Let travel take your mind on a short trip also. Travel is good for the soul, regardless of potential business stress. Decompress and do your best to enjoy yourself. YOLO, amigos. 

Are you traveling light and leaving your baggage behind when you hit the road?

This week’s Guy’s Guy of the Week is Ryan Bingham, George Clooney’s character in “Up in the Air”, an excellent film about a traveling corporate downsizer.

My First Father's Day - What My Son Has Taught Me in 5 Short Weeks

Robert Manni - Friday, June 14, 2013

My Dad just celebrated his 88th birthday.

To me, he’s the original Guy’s Guy. He taught me about love, family, women and work. He’s been a shining example of being a real man and I thank him for his kindness, wisdom and generosity. My new son, Sky, is five weeks old today. I’ve quickly learned that like my Dad, my son is also my teacher. So, in the spirit of Father’s Day, here are my Guy’s Guy musings on what my little man has already taught me in a few short weeks.

Patience – This is an understatement. Having spent most of my adult life as a self-absorbed, ego-driven selfish lout, it’s taken me a long timeprobably longer than mostto learn that life really isn’t all about me. I have renewed respect for my younger male friends who became fathers during their twenties and thirties. I started later and I’m glad, because frankly, I did not have the patience necessary to deal with an infant, their randomness and their directness. Even though I caught Sky in the delivery room, he’s understandably been all about his Mom, and my mother-in-lawwho only speaks to Sky in Korean. Are they forging a deal I need to know about? I wait patiently for him to give me a big smile and let me know I’m his Dad.

Paying Attention – My wife gave me a good lesson in this key behavior when we were dating and just when I thought I had passed the test… enter Sky. He insists that I focus all of my attention on him, keep track of the detailslike warming that bottle upand take the initiative for building a lasting bond with him. If not, he will ignore me or cry. I am on point at all times and Sky knows it. Good for him.

Parenting - Whether it’s always keeping him clean or applying his butt paste, I have an endless punch list of ways I can help my wife take care of my son. I assemble and look after the caravan of stuff whenever we take him out for a stroll in the park. He is the last thing I see at night and first thing in the morning, and I never know what’s going through his head. I just do my job and help out as best I can. It’s the least I can do.

Persistence – Since babies are all about need, he lets me know in no uncertain terms when he wants something—food, a change, a hug, a walk, whatever. And he keeps going and going. I’m not one to ignore an infant’s cry. How can I? He only knows one way to let you know that something is wrong. So I try different ways of addressing his need until I find what works. He’s training me well. Bottom line, like all babies, Sky’s engine runs 24/7 and he let’s me know exactly what he wants without any trace of subtext.

Perfection – All of this points to the perfection in babies. They are pure love. You can see it in their eyes. It brings me joy. It keeps me hopeful. Thank you, Sky.

This week’s Guy’s Guy of the Week is my Dad, Serge Manni. Thanks for everything. I hope I’m living up to your example of how to be a man.

What are you thankful for this Father’s Day?

The Guys' Guy's Guide to Living a Fit Life

Robert Manni - Friday, June 07, 2013

Image courtesy of NBC Bay Area

They say all good things come in moderation.

I agree, except when it comes to sex, but that’s for another post. This one is about living a fit life. I’m no fitness expert, but I just ran the 6.2-mile loop around Central Park for the third time this week and have logged three marathons. I know what’s worked for me. You can decide if it works for you. Here are a few concepts to consider, Guy’s Guy style.

1. You are what you eat. You’ve heard this a thousand times for a reason—it’s true. I’m not going for the deep dive, but studies have shown that all sickness and disease comes from your gut, so you'd better think about what you consume. In today’s world, eating and food are very different concepts than they were thirty years ago. GMO’s, pesticides, weird chemical additives, and all that disguised sugar can lead to a big gut and a heavy heart. How do we manage this while eating three times a day? First, consider eating six small meals a day to keep your metabolism humming. Ultimately, it boils down to consistently making mindful choices. Like many guys, I’m a snacker and I turn to food as a crutch. Plus, I’m Italian so I can’t escape people offering me food. The solution? Each time I sit down and stop and think before shoving food into my face.

2. Go easy on the meat. As we age, our metabolism slows, so digestion takes longer. That succulent porterhouse stays in your system a lot longer when you’re over forty. I stopped eating beef, lamb and pork six years ago and finally dropped poultry this year. Why? My body was telling me that I had enough, so I turned to fish, veggies and fruit and I’ve never looked back. I became ill about a month after cutting out meat, but I was told that this was a result of my cells detoxing. Bottom line, I have more energy and I don’t miss eating meat.

3. Walk. Although I walked to and from school while growing up, I never realized the pleasures of a good stroll until I moved to New York. If you really want to catch the vibe of this great city, walk. I mean walk everywhere. When I first moved to New York in the eighties, each Sunday I’d walk from my flat on West 34th Street to Chinatown for lunch and then back to Midtown. I’d take a different route each time and it gave me a great taste of what was a very different Manhattan.

4. Run. If your body allows you the pleasure of a good run, just do it. There is nothing like that long, sloping loop around Central Park or a jog along the boards at the beach. I bring running shoes when I travel because running helps reset your internal clock to prevent jet lag and it’s a great way to get the flavor of another city. And, I worked out my entire novel in my head while running back and forth from Asbury Park to Spring Lake. Plus, you need to maintain some semblance of fitness if you run.

5. Sleep. There is nothing like a good night’s sleep, but in today’s noisy world, sleeping soundly has become more of a rare feat than something that comes naturally. That’s why when you feel tired and you have time to catch a few zzz’s, it’s a good idea to nap. I never was a napper until I hit forty. Now I grab some shuteye when my body tells me to, and when my schedule allows. I’m still a night owl, but I do my best to not watch TV in bed. I also keep a calm environment in the bedroom and have an active love life.

We’ve only scratched the surface on fitness, but I think if you follow these general adages, you will create a foundation for a healthy lifestyle and good health.

Are you doing what you can to maintain a fit body and mind?

This week’s Guy’s Guy of the Week is Fauja Singh, (the Turban Tornado), recently retired 101 year old world’s oldest marathoner.

The Guys' Guy's Guide to Spiritual Books

Robert Manni - Friday, May 24, 2013

Being a Guy’s Guy is not all sex, drugs and rock n’ roll.

Reading keeps us in touch with our inner selves and reminds us of our collective connection to the universal consciousness. I’ve read hundreds of books in all genres, but I’m called back by great stories about regular people finding their paths and enlightenment and books about energy and spirituality.  Life speeds by in a flash, and it’s important to take a breather now and then and ask ourselves why the hell we're here, what really matters and how we can enjoy the ride. There are many well-deserving books that are not included, but the following features a handful of practical, thought provoking and well-written tomes with deep insights and positive messages. I hope you will find an opportunity to read a few of them. You will not be disappointed.  In no particular order I humbly offer, The Guys’ Guy’s Guide to Spiritual Books.

1. The Power of Your Subconscious Mind by Dr. Joseph Murphy. This is one of my all-time favorite books of any genre.  I was walking through a bookstore about ten years ago and this little book literally stopped me in my tracks. I picked it up, began reading and purchased it. I’ve read it several times and it convinced me to study hypnosis. I am now an advanced clinical Master Hypnotist. It’s fast, practical, easy to read and chock full of advice about self-hypnosis, staying positive and trusting your inner self. Sounds like bullshit? It’s not.

2. Creative Visualization by Shakti Gawain.  A classic New Age helper in seeing, believing and making it happen. Another easy to digest book that packs a punch and a reminder about how we choose our paths and determine our outcomes. Inspirational.

3. The Healing Energy of Your Hands by Michael Bradford. If you want to learn how to manipulate energy for healing, this is the one book to read. Filled with easy exercises and demonstrations, you can learn how to work with the flow of energy to heal and stay healthy. This book inspired me to study Reiki. I am now a Reiki Master/Teacher. It’s that good.

4. The Book of Love and Creation by Paul Selig. This is the second of what will be three contributions about tapping into universal love through the, “I Am” presence. Guides channeled these texts through Paul. The passages are uplifting, powerful, and filled with love. I highly recommend these books to anyone interested in raising their frequency.

5. The Art of Power by Thich Nhat Hahn. This one takes compassion and mindfulness into our everyday practical lives and into the halls of government and business. The mindfulness trainings alone are worth the price of admission. Great reading, especially if you have a foolish boss.

6. Anatomy of the Spirit by Caroline Myss, Ph.D. This pioneer in energy medicine expert explores how energy is encoded in our physical vessels and how we can read the signals and take positive steps in managing our spiritual and physical health.

7. Three Magic Words by Uell S. Anderson. If you read or watched the video of “The Secret” you will want to read this book. It strips out the pizzazz and gets down to how our conscious and subconscious minds determine our course of actions and outcomes. You will learn how to eliminate negativity and stay the course in practical terms and through a series of meditative exercises.

8. Many Lives, Many Masters by Brian Weiss, MD. If you have ever wondered what past life regression is and how it works, this is the book for you. As a hypnotist, I’ve explored past life regression and found that it to be an interesting way to learn more about who we are and what’s inside. Very easy reading as it follows one case from beginning to end. A page-turner.

9. Your Sacred Self by Dr. Wayne Dyer. Yes you’ve seen him on PBS and might think he’s merely a curator of other people’s findings. That said, he makes a lot of sense and he’s taken his game to another level over the past few years. I found this early book to be an excellent primer for learning how to tap into the power of our higher selves and others for self-improvement.

10. The Power of Awareness by Neville Goddard. Touted by Dr. Dyer, this little gem dives into the power of the “I Am” with forays into consciousness, creation, acceptance, and righteousness. Another book devoted to teaching us how we are all connected via a universal consciousness. In other yours, we all are God.

While buzzing along with your career, are you taking time to read and reflect on what’s really important in life?

This week’s Guy’s Guy of the Week is Brad Pitt for his support of his partner Angelina Jolie, one of the world’s most beautiful and boldest women. We wish her good health and love.

A Guys' Guy's Guide to Spring Cleaning

Robert Manni - Thursday, May 09, 2013

Spring cleaning. Throwing out the old, and discovering the new

Whether it’s about love, sex, dating or relationships spring is the perfect time for Guy’s Guys to take stock of who they are and where they want to be. Summer, the beach, and bikini weather is right around the corner.  And as the temperature rises, the skirts get shorter. You know the rest. Why reassess? Because it’s healthy, it will keep you on your path, and it could motivate you to connect with some great women. Here are five quick things to keep Guy’s Guys moving forward this spring.

1. Review your contacts.

Like a big old bear, it’s easy to hibernate during the winter. Same old, same old. And it can carry over to your dating life. Oh, it’s Friday night again? Let's hit the same sports bar and ogle the same women. You have your go-to hook ups, but are you really accomplishing anything beyond sharing a few laughs, watching every college football bowl game, and chilling with your buds and a friend with benefits? Ask yourselfis this the best you can do? If the answer is no, take stock in where you are versus your goals—in your career, fitness, or relationships and get cracking. If you find that your lady friends are locked into in the friend zone, then maybe it’s time to dust off your online dating profile. There are many, many fish in the sea, amigo, and that means lots of lovely ladies looking for nice guys. Don’t let your profile get stale and don’t stay posted-up for too long. Take a breather now and then before getting climbing back in the saddle.

2. Ask new women out.

Like a big old bear, it's easy to hibernate during the winter. Oh, it's Friday night again? Let's hit up the same sports bar and ogle the same women. You have your go-to hookups, but are you really accomplishing anything beyond sharing a few laughs, watching every college football bowl game, and chilling with your buds and a friend with benefits? Ask yourself: is this the best you can do? If the answer is "no," take stock in where you are versus where you want to be—your career, fitness or relationship goals; and get crackin'. If you find that your lady friends are locked into the dreaded friend zone, maybe it's time to dust off your online dating profile. There are many, many fish in the sea, amigo, and that means lots of lovely ladies looking for nice guys. Don't let your profile get stale, and don't stay posted-up for too long. Take a breather now and then before climbing back in the saddle.

3. Cut your losses.

Maybe you've maintained your comfort zone by sharing a relationship with someone you like, but don't like enough. This relationship is more than friends with benefits, but it's become a convenience for both of you. You know something is missing. Hey, knocking boots is fun, but if either the sex or the conversation is lacking, it may be time for the talk. Be a gentleman, but consider moving on.

4. Review your diet.

Sickness begins in the gut. Trust me or do your own research; you'll see that I'm right. And our tendency is to consume lots of comfort food and drink during those cold, dark months. Now that the weather's warm and you want to be active, reassess what you're ingesting. Like a lot of single guys, I've gone through phases where I've sustained myself on ketchup and beer and canned soup. We're creatures of habit. If you can't cut the junk and your small-batch bourbon, at least add fruits and veggies and water to your daily intake. You'll see a difference in your mood and in your waistline. Plus, the ladies notice what you eat and what it does to your body. Just sayin'.

5. Relax.

This is a marathon, not a sprint so you've got time to adapt. Spring is the perfect time to take a deep breath, shift gears and try something new. And whatever you do, don't let the media or your friends and family play the fear card with you. Take life by the cajones. There's really nothing to fear but fear itself. Meet lots of new women, reassess your lifestyle and diet, eliminate people and situations that are no longer useful, and chill. Live your life to the fullest. Now that's being a Guy's Guy.

What are you doing to better yourself this spring?

Guy's Guy of The Week: the newest member of the Guy's Guy family—my newborn son, Sky Manni.

NPR Interview with Lisa Davis

Robert Manni - Monday, May 06, 2013

What is a Guy's Guy? (Part III)

Robert Manni - Thursday, May 02, 2013

We’re at a critical juncture for redefining men and bridging the communications gap between the sexes.

It’s ironic that with all of our technology, communication between men and women has never been in such a dire state. Over the past thirty years the paths of women and men have changed dramatically. While women have been on straight trajectory of achievement, accomplishment, and long overdue recognition, men find themselves in a tough spot. Although men have never been freer to be whomever they want, it’s also never been less clear who they are. Women are on the move and men refuse to change. There is resentment, a lack of empathy and understanding on both sides. We’re heading in different directions. Enter the Guy’s Guy.

So, What Is A Guy’s Guy?

A Guy’s Guy is a contemporary Man’s Mana nod to the return of the casual confidence and seductive integrity of the classic maleupdated to reflect a belief that everybody wins when men and women can be at their best. A Guy’s Guy welcomes the rise of women, yet competes with them for love, sex, power and money in a time when everyone plays for keeps. Guy’s Guys exude unassuming strength, timeless style, and emotional intelligence. They seek healthy relationships and joyful living. Today’s Guy’s Guy has moved light-years beyond the time when men gave lip service to feminism while struggling to see women beyond the kitchen and the bedroom. Guy’s Guys consider women equal in all ways and treat them respectfully. They don’t patronize women for sex and it’s game on in business with no glass ceilings. 

Why Do Guy’s Guy Matter?

Men are in crisis and risk falling behind if they don’t evolve. How can young men learn what it means to be a man in this rapidly evolving society when they receive such conflicting signals about masculinity that leave them caught between the roid-rage messages of MMA and the tinted moisturizing of manscaping? With Hollywood’s one-dimensional preening power studs, metrosexuals, geeks, and superheroes as role models, many young men are left adrift. Middle-age men fare no better. Traditionally defined by their jobs, the ascension of women and the tough economy has changed everything. Women, more self-sufficient and on the move, will not slow down or step aside to accommodate men’s out of step ideas and constructs. Men need to re-examine their roles and be open to new possibilities where they share the wealth and the burdens. It’s not just up to the men; women need to pitch in as well. Women can help usher in positive change through empathy and understanding as men learn to redefine themselves.

So What’s Next?

This is a wake up call, not a death sentence for men. You’ll find today’s open-minded Guys’ Guys everywhere—learning as they navigate a challenging environment. For a Guy’s Guy, there’s never been a better time to be a man. When men and women can be at their best, everyone wins. Right?

Our Guy's Guy of the Week is John Stuart Mill, a 19th century proponent of women's rights.

Is Your Guy A Guy’s Guy?

4 Ways To Keep Your Guy Happy

Robert Manni - Thursday, April 25, 2013

Size matters. That said, one size does not fit all.

So take these words of wisdom with a grain of salt because every man is different. However, most fit under a fairly big tent when it comes to knowing what they like from a woman. That's not to say that if you don't follow these tips he's going to immediately bolt out of the door and hit the ground running, but you might want to keep these in mind if you want your guy to remain your happy camper. Here are a few starters for your consideration. If you’re not sure about them, ask a guy. Better yet, ask a Guy’s Guy.

1. Keep the sex fresh. 

Most guys fall into patterns concerning what gets them off, both mentally and physically. And we know they are visual. Their preferences could be for women who are super-fit, thick and delish, lean and mean, the girl next store, women on top, yee-haw cowgirl style, leather and lace, cheerleader, she’s the man, whatever. No judgments here. It’s got to work for both of you. But when guys find something they like, they tend to stick with a proven formula. Yes, men are creatures of habit. If you always serve it up to them the same way, most guys will take it and say thank you. Better yet, if you take whatever they like and kick it up a notch, your guy will follow you around like a puppy dog. But remember: it has to work for you both.

2. His stomach is a tried and true path to his heart. 

Yes, guys like to eat and drink. It helps if you enjoy food as much as he does and better yet if one of you likes to cook. And even better yet, that person is you. Most guys today not only know how to cook, but they take pride in their culinary skills. But, sometimes that means being the grill general, not the sous chef, the dessert maker, the baker, the salad dresser, etc. Usually one partner leads the cooking. Yes, I know we're all busy, but guys love to eat a home cooked meal and wash it down with a quality beverage. So if you are so inclined, take charge and every so often feed your guy good, healthy fare. Many single guys live day-to-day by doing take out or the microwave or by grabbing a burger at the local tavern—and that’s it until the weekend. Any help his partner provides concerning food and drink will be welcomed. I promise. If you don’t cook, consider bringing him some healthy take out. And when it comes to drinks, if you and your guy like beer, wine or spirits, drink moderately, but only drink the real good stuff. When you bring home a top-shelf pinot noir—that’s a check plus, my dear.

3. Be supportive of his dream. 

Many guy’s lives seem to be built on waking each day to slug it out at the office. And there's nothing wrong with that, but I’ll bet that deep down every guy has a dream. Maybe it’s been squashed or put on hold by economic necessities, time, or responsibilities to others. But, I’ll bet if you take the time, you can open your man up and encourage him to express his personal goals and aspirations. Frankly, you are probably the only one who is asking him, so it's important and he will be appreciative—as long as you’re sincere and not patronizing. And if he has a tangible goal that he has the ability to accomplish, by all means: be there to cheer him on. That’s what partners do for each other.

4. Give him the benefit of the doubt. 

 Men screw up. A lot. And we usually know when we screw up. The last thing we need is our partner rubbing it in our face. Talk about it, address the core issue and hopefully move on, unless he’s cheating on you. Obviously that's unacceptable and you’ll need to decide if you want to give him another chance or not. You'll know best about that situation so follow your inner compass. I’m not suggesting that you waste your time on a guy who cheats, but every situation is different so find out what drove him into this negative behavior. If it’s a pattern, say "adios amigo". But get the facts. Naturally, there are a lot other situations that guys screw up, but we'll save that for another time.

I hope that’s a start to better understanding guys and managing your relationships. Remember, guys are flawed, but they have promise and need your help to be their very best. 

Our Guy's Guy of the Week is Bob Marley, for always spreading a positive vibration.

Are you doing the things that keep your guy happy?

Things Guy's Guys Like (Part 2)

Robert Manni - Thursday, April 11, 2013

So what’s a Guy’s Guy?

I keep getting asked this question, and it’s a good thing because in a world where men have never been as free to be whoever they want, it’s never been less clear who they are.  Once again, simply stated, a Guy’s Guy is a contemporary Man’s Man, with a nod to a return to the casual confidence and seductive integrity of the classic male, but updated to reflect the belief that everybody wins when men and women can be at their best. A few months ago I posted a partial list of all things Guy’s Guythe likes and dislikes.

So without further ado, I submit the second installment, the sequel if you will, of all things Guy’s Guys. And yes, since a Guy’s Guy is flexible and open-minded, this list is subject to change.

More Things That Guy’s Guys Like

A smile from across the room, Opening Day at Yankee Stadium, winning a piece of new business, your father’s laughter, a sweaty workout after a long night, homemade smoothies, early Sunday morning in NYC, flip flops, the Jolly Roger, The Eagles first album, that first dive and last dives into the ocean each year, grilled fish, reruns of Mister Ed when you’re hung over, reeling a feisty bluefish into the boat, that broken-in leather belt that goes with everything, connecting people and seeing it all work out, a pair of freshly broken-in running shoes, a fluffy towel after a hot shower, your fantasy football draft, fish tacos, sex in the morning, outdoor cafes in May, when technology makes life easier, driving the green, that first kiss, women with toned bodies, active listening, vintage acoustic guitars, summer wind, kids playing, aloe plants, waking up next to someone you love, Jeff Bridges movies, always having a great joke to tell, content over curating, radio, heels and shapely calves, peaceful solutions, going for it, organic, Joe Frazier, pancakes with real maple syrup, the heavyweight championship of the world on the line, your own personal style, that go-to pair of jeans, Orchard Street south of Delancey, dark rum, free weights, a good night’s sleep, three-run homers.

More Things Guy’s Guys Don’t Like

Unnecessary sequels of bad movies, not showing up, standing inline, insufficient fare on your Metro card as the C train pulls into the station, dirty looks from the bartender when you order a club soda, rushing to cross the street as the light changes while pushing a stroller, not qualifying a sales lead, covering your ass with email, paying retail for clothing, retail workers talking to one another other while you’re waiting to pay, greeters at banks (WTF), reality shows about hillbillies and swamp people, not saying “thank you” when someone does you a solid, OMG, unlabeled GMO foods, “who are you wearing?”, skinny jeans on dudes, light beer ads that think they’re clever, big dogs forced to live in little apartments, white flour/rice/sugar, a weak clammy handshake, cigarettes, ads using dogs (lazy), steroids (WTF), sugary breakfast cereal that claim they are good for you, obviousness, violent video games, fear-inducing media, watching too much sports (really), trash talk, teams that run out the clock at the end, of the first half, waking up to construction noise on the weekend, the weeks between the Super Bowl and March Madness, chasing fashion, air kisses, artificial sweeteners, uninspired kisses (why even bother).

I could go on and on and on, but that should suffice for now.

This week’s Guy’s Guy of the Week is LeBron James. Even if you're a Knicks fan, but you've got to give him props. The “King” is on a roll.

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