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On Life, Love and the Pursuit of Happiness

What Happened to Men?

Robert Manni - Wednesday, July 13, 2011


Image courtesy of Horia Varlan

That’s a question that’s been tossed about quite a bit these changing days.  Over the past fifty years our lives have changed dramatically.  Science and technology relentlessly march onward and women have ascended and are slowly, but unwaveringly getting more of their deserved due.  And men? In many ways, they’ve become the whipping boys for all of the world’s ills. And who can defend them for centuries of war, misogyny, and ego-driven careless behavior? That’s a challenged, but they’re just wired differently in a lot of ways and conditioned by vastly different messages about how to behave and what is cool and manly.

While channel-surfing recently, I noticed that almost without fail, the movies targeting male audiences were seeped in mindless violence and gratuitous sex.  Most of the movies aimed at women were about relationships and participating in communal activities. The messaging couldn’t have been further apart.  And we wonder why there is so much strife and misunderstanding between the sexes. It should come as no surprise. The communications gap between the sexes grows whenever stereotypes are reinforced.  But as women are provided with more opportunities for full expression and equality, they’ve encroached on what had typically been male-dominated territory. Today, women are more educated than men, more represented in the work force, and are now portrayed as action stars, so even that last bastion of perceived macho maleness that men have held for so many years is also under siege.

What's A Man To Do?

Today’s men need to relax and see the opportunity. Most of what women do that men object to is rooted in a goal of improving the relationship. Whether it’s coaxing men to pay attention and or not try and solve a woman’s problems for her, it all has the same goal of mutual satisfaction and sharing.  But in these days of retargeting media and basically pushing images and products in front of us only based on past behavior and preferences, it’s harder than ever for men to evolve.  If they like hot rods and wrestling, they are going to be pummeled with advertising for beer, tires, and chicken wings.  It’s hard to change your mind when the media is attacking your subconscious with every move you make. Guys will have to work to transcend the stereotypes they’ve created for themselves.  When they do, they’ll see that things have never been better. Women want to share, not necessarily take over.  They pursue men (that’s a nice change), earn their way, and do not expect a man to create a life or career for them. They are capable, more fit and beautiful than ever, smarter and increasingly capable, and sexually liberated.  

How Bad Is That, Fellas?

I’ll be delving deeper into this topic in upcoming blogs, so stay tuned, and please don’t think this is only about men needing to reconsider their perspective…

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